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How can I reduce the stress in my divorce?

Unless you have gone through a divorce before, you may be feeling stress that comes with the worry that you will make a mistake. Once the court signs the divorce orders, you may have to live for years with your decisions, and that could mean those years will be full of struggle and regret.

Texas laws concerning divorce are complex, and they change often. Unless you have the time to research your unique divorce issues, you may be unsure of the options and limitations you face. Surrounding yourself with skilled and pragmatic advisors is a good way to avoid making mistakes that could jeopardize your future.

Keeping it real

If divorce is a new experience for you, you may not even know what questions to ask. Looking to the wrong people for advice can lead to terrible decisions. While your close friends and family members may have your welfare at heart, they may be just as emotionally involved as you, making it difficult for them to offer unbiased advice. You may also spend many hours searching the internet for answers, but in truth, you may be looking for articles that will support what you want to believe.

Your first step toward relieving your uncertainty is to find an attorney who is compatible with your personality, appreciative of your goals and honest about the potential outcome of your case. It may be worth it to consult with several before you make your decision. Your attorney should put you at ease and may advise you to do the following:

  • Do not keep secrets from your legal counsel, especially regarding your assets.
  • Assemble a team that may include financial advisors, therapists and those friends who will truly support you.
  • Learn as much as you can about the reality of your family's assets and debts.
  • Understand that your divorce will take time and may not meet any unreasonable expectations you have heard from friends and family.

If you have a vision that your divorce will be a great get-even moment where you will walk away vindicated and leave your spouse destitute, it is time to put away that fantasy. You may find it helpful to bring your expectations to your divorce team so they can put them into perspective and help you focus on a more realistic and attainable resolution.

By following the advice of the professionals you choose to guide you through this painful time, you may come through with a more positive future ahead of you.

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